Tuesday, March 29, 2005
My biorhythms are severely out of whack; I've been sleeping at 4am and waking up at 11am. I need to realign my waking hours with those of normal, diurnally-adjusted people. Operating in a different timezone affects one's ability to function in sync with the rest of the (immediate) world, which has obvious practical drawbacks. The solitude of a nocturnal existence may have its merits, but... I've been ambling off-course long enough. Time to reset the clock.
Procrastination is a difficult habit to shake. Of course, most of it is a delusory exercise in delaying the unpleasant, but I've come to suspect that part of it is about thrill-seeking - deliberately cornering oneself into tight deadlines can be quite stimulating. The adrenaline rush, the caffeine, the sudden pressing need for efficiency and multi-tasking... and finally, the vicious sense of satisfaction when a task is accomplished Just In Time.
Pulling an all-nighter may just about address both problems. I can get things done AND force myself into a normal daily routine.
Last week of March already. It's more or less confirmed now, I'll be flying off to China on 21 May for a month-long budget trip. Finances are sound, parental objections are inconsequential, and now all's left are mere... details.
Details. Trivia. If I had my way I could happily devote my life to assimilating and putting them in order. Recently, I spent 2 hours cleaning out my cluttered desk drawers and rearranging their contents to improve item accessibility and efficiency of space utilisation. I have an obsession with conventionally-coloured ultra-fine pens, penknives, long rulers, labels, clear folders, ring files and Bindermax sheet protectors.
I have this lurking suspicion that my true ambition - to hell with the 'biomed research' cover story - is to devise the perfect filing system. It's frightfully unambitious - even worse than consigning myself to a career in pharmacy, I would imagine.
words were spilled on Tuesday, March 29, 2005
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Thursday, March 24, 2005
After a month or so of gentle and lazy drifting, of being wrapped up in a cozy fictional universe of strange new worlds, spatial anomalies, interstellar war and general geekiness, reality has won out once again.
I'm starting to feel (after a long, pleasurable hiatus) that scholarships are more trouble than they are worth. A*Star doesn't intend to let me off easy, oh no - they are following Firefly's grand example of inflicting a full day's worth of 'group and individual activities' that are 'designed with a fun element' on shortlisted applicants. Followed by a panel interview (but of course), where my sadly-deficient skills at prevarication and spin-doctoring will be put to the test. Grilled by an entire ensemble of pitiless tormentors in what is nothing less than an interrogation chamber. Pardon the hyperbole, but the interview-phobic mind tends to perceive things this way, especially if the results of experience haven't been very encouraging.
It doesn't help that I've acquired a rather unfortunate and morbid fascination with the art of interrogation. It's difficult trying to put things into perspective when all I can think about is how my body language, vocal inflections and hapless babblings are going to betray my shortcomings and how my inquisitors are going to ruthlessly exploit every single one of them to take me apart piece by cringing piece.
Sounds ludicrous, but as I said, it's a silly phobia, and one that refuses to go away - to my everlasting annoyance.
words were spilled on Thursday, March 24, 2005
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Monday, March 07, 2005
The new
trailer for 'The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' is even more fun than the first. Watch it; it's hilarious.
words were spilled on Monday, March 07, 2005
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Thursday, March 03, 2005
Time Warp - Rocky Horror Picture Show
RiffRaff:
It's astounding;
Time is fleeting;
Madness takes its toll.
But listen closely...
Magenta:
Not for very much longer.
RiffRaff:
I've got to keep control.
I remember doing the time-warp
Drinking those moments when
The Blackness would hit me
RiffRaff:
And the void would be calling...
Transylvanians:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Narrator:
It's just a jump to the left.
All:
And then a step to the right.
Narrator:
With your hands on your hips.
All:
You bring your knees in tight.
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Magenta:
It's so dreamy, oh fantasy free me.
So you can't see me, no, not at all.
In another dimension, with voyeuristic intention,
Well secluded, I see all.
RiffRaff:
With a bit of a mind flip
Magenta:
You're into the time slip.
RiffRaff:
And nothing can ever be the same.
Magenta:
You're spaced out on sensation.
RiffRaff:
Like you're under sedation.
All:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Columbia:
Well I was walking down the street just a-having a think
When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink.
He shook-a me up, he took me by surprise.
He had a pickup truck, and the devil's eyes.
He stared at me and I felt a change.
Time meant nothing, never would again.
All:
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Narrator:
It's just a jump to the left.
All:
And then a step to the right.
Narrator:
With your hands on your hips.
All:
You bring your knees in tight.
But it's the pelvic thrust
That really drives you insane.
Let's do the time-warp again.
Let's do the time-warp again.
For some reason, this song describes my present mood perfectly. Fine, maybe not _all_ the lyrics are applicable, but the overall insanity of the song is... infectious, and horribly apt.
Hope things turned out all right for all you people out there.
words were spilled on Thursday, March 03, 2005
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On my way back from the Ang Mo Kio library today, I made a detour to the neighbourhood park. Interestingly enough, in 5 years' worth of residence here I haven't even fully explored that place yet. Viewed from the main road, the park has an unassuming, slightly 2-dimensional appearance. There is a small lake with lotus plants, but the lake is overgrown, murky and not all too attractive to look at. But my little reconnaissance mission revealed a fairly large park interior with numerous jogging tracks vanishing into tantalisingly forested areas. Bougainvillea draped over masonry. Rows of stately royal palms. The park was also fairly deserted: there was the occasional jogger or elderly citizen doing taiqi but other than that, all I had for company were Mother Nature, pavillions and park benches.
I think I shall pay the park a morning visit tomorrow. I may even do a photo profile.
Anything to anaesthesise the lurking terror that lies in wait.
words were spilled on Thursday, March 03, 2005
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