Thursday, March 24, 2005
After a month or so of gentle and lazy drifting, of being wrapped up in a cozy fictional universe of strange new worlds, spatial anomalies, interstellar war and general geekiness, reality has won out once again.
I'm starting to feel (after a long, pleasurable hiatus) that scholarships are more trouble than they are worth. A*Star doesn't intend to let me off easy, oh no - they are following Firefly's grand example of inflicting a full day's worth of 'group and individual activities' that are 'designed with a fun element' on shortlisted applicants. Followed by a panel interview (but of course), where my sadly-deficient skills at prevarication and spin-doctoring will be put to the test. Grilled by an entire ensemble of pitiless tormentors in what is nothing less than an interrogation chamber. Pardon the hyperbole, but the interview-phobic mind tends to perceive things this way, especially if the results of experience haven't been very encouraging.
It doesn't help that I've acquired a rather unfortunate and morbid fascination with the art of interrogation. It's difficult trying to put things into perspective when all I can think about is how my body language, vocal inflections and hapless babblings are going to betray my shortcomings and how my inquisitors are going to ruthlessly exploit every single one of them to take me apart piece by cringing piece.
Sounds ludicrous, but as I said, it's a silly phobia, and one that refuses to go away - to my everlasting annoyance.
words were spilled on Thursday, March 24, 2005
