Yay. Behold, the first Quizilla test result to be posted on this blog:
obsessive compulsive
Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla
What a surprise, indeed.
Sometimes I wonder what people really think of me. This afternoon I was told that one of my classmates found me a 'nice' person to talk to. I responded with incredulity, 'cos I've always thought of myself as something of a failure of a conversationalist. And... I'm not essentially 'nice', in my opinion. I'm self-centred, not prone to displays of love, affection, care or concern, and this is something that I've always regretted. (Sometimes I suspect that I'm emotionally deficient. Double-edged personal survival tactics and all... life has too many ironies to mention.) So it was a pleasant surprise to hear that bit of feedback today. It's always nice to know that you're not being as irksome as you fear.
/damn... I WILL not whine, I WILL not whine.../
(to Judith: your fault for planting that idea in my head, now I anxiously scan every line I've typed so that it won't sound too indulgently angsty. Hey, I didn't think it was all that bad, you know. I'm fully aware that this is a public blog.)
Finally got down to reading Judith's blog after approx. 1 week. (sorry... I know I said 'daily dose of intellectualism':-) Interesting, you think corpses aren't scary? That's because the mortician did a good job. I think the normal corpses you see in coffins are scary in the understated-horror sort of way. I speak from personal experience at my grandfather's funeral this year. It was unsettling (but I shan't touch on how much of that was due to me being disturbed with myself). The comparison to wax figures could be made, but what struck me most was the way I finally managed to notice all the details of the skin, spots and blemishes, the wrinkles, the way the closed eyelids bulge from the pressure of the eyes beneath them... details that I never really picked up on while my grandfather was still alive. In life, there are other things about the person that distract you from their physical characteristics. When the person's gone... you can't help but pay more attention to the physical shell. That is, if you're morbid like me.
I wish I could blog further, but my sister is yelling at me for our daily anime-cum-dinner session. We're going to finish 'Chobits' tonight, last 2 episodes. How sad.
words were spilled on Saturday, July 26, 2003
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